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Balancing Parenting and Marriage: Nurturing Love Amidst the Chaos

Nobody is denying that parenting is a rollercoaster. From sleepless nights to endless diaper changes, our little bundles of joy bring a whole lot into our lives. This usually means that we are doing parenting from sun up to sun down, which does not leave a lot of time or energy leftover for our marriage. In this blog post, I want to dig into the art of balancing being loving parents and nurturing our marriage.

As new parents, we often find ourselves immersed in the world of parenting which comes with its joys and responsibilities. Amidst the chaos of raising little ones, it's easy for our marriage to take a backseat. The transition to parenthood can lead to decreased marital satisfaction and increased stress, which can strain the bond with our partners. Many couples find ourselves juggling parenting responsibilities while yearning for the emotional connection we once had in our marriage. Only about 33% of relationship do not see a decrease in satisfaction with their partners during this time. Which means, we are not alone in thinking, "what the heck happened to my marriage?!"

The Importance of Balancing Parenting and Marriage

If is is so hard to balance parenting and marriage, then why try? If we look at the research that has come out of the Gottman's research on children that grow up in a house with a happy and stable relationship, we can see that sticking this balance is extremely important. Not only is having peace and balance important for you and your partner, but it is important for your children. Children that live in a family that strikes this balance have higher IQ, better emotional and mental wellbeing, a secure attachment not only to their parents but to other adults and peers, less stress, more resilient, better conflict management skills and the list goes on. If we want our children to have the best chance possible, it is worth it to work on this balance between parenting and marriage, especially in the first few years of life. Of course, if there are struggles that seem like they are our of your control, reach out to a mental health professional.

Finding a Balance between Parenting and Marriage

Prioritize Quality Time Together

Carving out dedicated time for each other is vital amidst the hectic schedules of parenting. It could be a weekly date night, a cozy movie evening at home, or a leisurely walk in the park. Quality time does not equal a lot of time. We all know we do not have a lot of time to spare anyways. Be creative, come up with ways to connect on a deeper level that do not take a lot of time or money. This time allows us to reconnect and remember why we fell in love in the first place. Quality time fosters emotional intimacy and helps us rediscover the aspects that drew us together as a couple.

Sometimes, when we are prioritizing quality time, that means holding boundaries elsewhere that we are not used to holding. Maybe that means getting to work and leaving from work on time. Maybe this means saying no to activities with extended family or friends.

Parenting As a Team

Emphasize Emotional Attunement

Nurture Communication

Prioritize Self-Care

Seek Support

Be Patient and Understanding

Balancing parenting and marriage is undoubtedly a challenge, but with the right tools and mindset, we can navigate this journey successfully. By maintaining connection, nurturing communication, and finding a balance between parenting responsibilities and our marriage, we can strengthen our emotional bond and create a harmonious and fulfilling family life.

As parents, let's embrace this journey with open hearts and minds, knowing that by investing in our relationship, we are building a strong foundation for our children's future and our own happiness. Remember, it's the little efforts and gestures of love that go a long way in nurturing a lasting and loving partnership amidst the beautiful chaos of parenting and marriage.


Hi, I’m Kristina Anzell, I am a Clinical Social Worker dedicated to providing specialized and compassionate mental health support for moms postpartum. My mission is to empower you to thrive in your role as a mother while nurturing your own well-being. If you enjoyed this blog post, check out my blog here! If you want more information or are seeking treatment, feel free to reach out!

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